*Did I give birth to you? if Yes You are in If no....finding another loop hole to all that is Muffin, may still be available to you.
* Did I ever, or Do I now... Sleep with you?....In the Nocturnal Sense, the Copulations questions comes later...If Yes... You are In, If No... take a Benedryl, and don't use my pillow, Additional loopholes May Follow.
*Did I ever Copulate you or you copulate me? Yes? You're In! No? Why? what the Fucks wrong with you?
*Are we related....Meaning: Do I call you Brother, Sister, Cousin, Aunt, Uncle, or possible loop hole...basically, do I call you...You know on the phone, or... out of the living room cuz, I need my shoulders rubbed?
*Did you ever buy... or Might you ever buy... anything Im selling....this includes but is not limited to... Hot wheel Cars, A load of Crap... or Real Estate? Si'? You're In! Nine?...well Fuck off! (Nine is German for No)
*Did we ever serve Jail Time together? There are several areas of my memory that I completely don't recall....I'm just seeing if by some chance one of you slip up and reveal it to me!
*Did you ever Name anything after me? Dogs carry the name Brandie(Y) quite well, as do Tranny's, Strippers, and offspring of alcoholics. Yes? You are in! No? ...Something for future consideration!
*Do you have a sense of Humor and are you easily offended? If the first part is a yes then you are in! If you are easily offended...Dont even Bother...and You got two Issues...One: you think you matter to the world and you dont....and two: you really should stop taking things so personally, Just a lil Muffin Tip!
*Do you have a Paypal account? (Information will be saved for future use and will not be sold to anyone! Well unless you can pay more then they are offering for the info!)
I was about to Blog Three Things I want in my PERFECT MATE....when Out of the Blue I notice a Draft Blog....Im all like, "Whoa hold the Phone....I failed to Post something?" When does this happen? I was all cheesing my new blog Idea stolen from EJHJ's English Comp class...This teacher of his is a Blog Topic "Gene~ess"...She Chinese too with very thick Beijing accent...Makes for great conversation over dinner! The EHoov Jr Is loving his college debut!
Just a thinkin....~Muffin
Those Shoes in the Retro Picture Scream "Muffany"
ReplyDeleteOuch...looking at that pose makes me hurt. And you wanna do that? Girlfriend-go for it!
ReplyDeleteI can still touch the ground with my flat palms and am perfectly content with that but... I may consider taking up that weight loss plan AFTER I see the criteria. Making no promises though- I like food and I like Yoga- but you get into that aerobic get your heart pumping real fast shit and Im out.
I wouldn't do yoga for all the camel toe in the world. Probably break something if I tried. Like my spirit.
ReplyDeleteI dont think I will ever do that Pose! Lol And the Diet is Jullian Michael...Im starting on Monday Im gearing up though this week! It will be easy except for the work out part...Im so unmotivated for physical activity and Im craving Wine already! WTF!? Why must it be so fattening?
ReplyDeleteI got David to Do Yoga Loum and he loved it...Its not what you think it is and its a great stretch, even euphoric...Great stress release for an old stoner like me!