Tuesday, February 15, 2011

83...Thats the Number...On my way to Goatsville, I chatted with you!

This will be my 83rd Blog....at 100 I will bust out the Goat! 

SO... whats new in the World O' Muffin?...
well besides a totally cool St Paddys name (ie: O'Muffin...just thought that up)...Not too much! I'm working like crazy to bring 3 contracts that have each independently fallen apart and miraculously pulled back together over the last several months to a close!  Seriously, One contract has been pending 5 months! That's Real Estate Speak for: OH MY GAWD I SO NEED PAID ALREADY!!!!

I called and Accused my Sister of Spelling me...She binded me when I got Married...So shes capable of VooDoo WhooDoo, Hexs dont have to be all bad either, there are good hexes although not by definition of the word!....Shes one of the sneaky bitches that talks shit up though! And I do mean SHIT...and now Im feeling all this crazy inward pressure ...Im not talking Gas...Im talking gut type... Soul Seeking... Inward Pain.... Plus, have yall looked outside? Moons got a Halo and that means a storm is coming! Hope not a Shit Storm! Some people are Drama...and by saying that I dont mean anyone Specific...OKAY? Just that when you are skipping along minding your own BeesWax on Occasion, Drama Happens and Happens to YOU! Ie: Me or Us ...well rather... Everyone....
More on that as it unfolds Im sure....

Oh Hells Yeah...Loum is Louming again with his crazy lists! I think he is a cross between Bill Gates and Rain Man with his need to list! Lists.....Speaking of Lists, I need to list all the shit I have to do before I leave outta here for Jessica's in the Morning! Blogging wasn't on that list! It is now though... Simply so I can cross it off! Makes me feel Accomplished! A Marked Off  List that is! I should come up with a few Lists...Top Five Opposites of Loums perhaps....Let me See...its his top five T's to Avoid in Texas...I'm lazy what the Eff...Top ten Five T's to Avoid in Florida:

Top 5 T's to avoid in Florida....................

One: TAN LINES Avoid them! Either go all white and no tan or get all nakid...Spray it on, or Fake and Bake it, I don't care...but nothing says Trashy like a strapless dress and a Tank Tan Line!

TWO: Trashy Tank Tops....Yes I suppose You "do have the Pussy" so you make the Rules...But Do I really need to see that walk by my lunch table while with clients? I suppose that makes you Witty and Uninhibited to wear that in public...It makes you a few other things as well, but Im too Lady Like to Say it here!

Three: ...Triangles and Tangles! Thats right! The wind Blown Look is sexy but ladies Brush your Hair...Ol Boy cant run his fingers through a rats nest! OH Yeah...&; Love Triangles, they're just all around messy...Avoid!

Four... Scented Tampons...Seriously If I want my Vajayjay to smell like Fresh Mountain Dew...Ill go Hiking, K?

Five and Finally: T Rex's.... we have them in Florida! Its True.. they are way fucking scarier then the Texas T Rex too!

Hang in and Ill let it all hang out!
Can we get a Blog Challenge going people?
Comment Down there...Follow Over there



  1. I will put up a Texas-size T-Rex against any swampy, dirty, scented tampon-wearing Florida-Rex anytime!

    Fresh Mountain Dew...

    I can't go for the goat this time. I'm way too far behind, and I don't think I got that many lists in me!

  2. I prefer my Mountain Dew to be Carbonated...Just sayin'

  3. When I was in miami on business, we were at a swanky hotel (Paris Hilton & Fergie were there at the same time as us). It also happened to be spring break and there was some modeling something-or-other going on.
    Needless to say, those who were NOT wearing bikinis were wearing mini-dresses. My boss, who is about 50 and female, looks at me and says "I wonder how they get their underwear to not show in those things!"
    I looked at her and started laughing. I said "You assume they are wearing it"

    She was a bit repulsed and went on a rant about how even if they were wearing thongs, surely their nasty juices would get on the seats at the bar and "god-knows-where-else-they-sit" and how SHE could sit on their ickiness and OMG what kind of diseases could they have if they are so trashy to wear these slutty clothes... you get the idea.

    That's what your list reminded me of - so now you have a full vomity visual of my trip to Miami Beach ;)

  4. I can't stop laughing at the Mountain Dew vagina. I am already going through vagina and mountain dew withdrawls since I gave both of them up, but if you combined the two I would just have a heart attack.

  5. "I put a spell on you and know your mine"

    Bring on the goat baby..... bahhhhh oh damn thats a sheep~ damn barn yard animals

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