Thursday, July 22, 2010

Schweaty Balls....

Im so hot I think I might throw up...I just did work out number three...I swear I need to blog after-wards each day just to cool off enough to shower....seriously folks, I aint playing, its fucking hot up in this joint!
I failed to consume 1394 required calories yesterday, Im going to struggle to do so today...I noticed with her meal plan that its a lot of work just to Im not talking about the occasional exhausting burger..forced into consumption by party muchies either...its a damn chore to eat this much food! Im not sticking to her diet verbatim either because I could never feed David Mango and Hootchie crusted pork chops passed off as chocolate...AND he lost Four Pounds just by being super fricken picky about when and what he puts in his mouth based on MY meal plan....MEN SUCK!

Im learning to breathe properly...I also did an asthma treatment before my work out and felt like I sucked in ten times more oxygen....I dont have asthma but when I came home from Savannahs Graduation AKA "Party ~Balls~ Weekend 2010" I was sick...I had strep and it turned into a lung infection...I didnt know at first it was strep...see Hang Overs aint what they used to be I'll tell you that!  The doctor gave me so many antibiotics I had bread growing ...(Ladies...I know you know what Im talking about!)  I had to quit the meds eat more yogart then I can consume and place it places you couldnt imagine....unless you are a holistic then you can imagine...I then had to put my pride aside break down and pay for my albuterol....First thing I thought about when I openned the box...and the same thing I think about everytime I use it.....
When I was a Kid I dated this guy named John...he had asthma...good thing too cuz when we needed a pipe to smoke our pot out of we would pop the canister out, stuff one end with Aluminum foil molded just the right way with perfect earring back holes punched threw and it was Bob and Teds reunion time~ Woot!

See what happens when delirium kicks in...euphoria comes ...then a bright light.....Next is a midget woman yelling "Carol Anne"...
"Come to the Light!!!!!!"

"All are Welcome!"

Teek...thanks for checking on me!
XO Muffin~Huffin


    Homage paid.!!!
    Did the holistic healing work for ya? I forgot to ask, but I am glad I wasn't at the home front to have some of that " bread" your talking about....

    that midget scared the hell out of me...just sayin'

    keep with the program sister...All the steps lead to the dream washboard

  2. Hootchie crusted pork chops--thats some funny shit right there sister. I hate those damn meds, and yes, I do know exactly what your talking bout. In fact anytime I take an antibiotic, he writes me up a script for dyfulcan(sp) cause I know whats coming. Keep up the good work...Im proud of ya and can't wait to see some pics of that dream washboard. In Arnie's voice: YOU CAN DO IT!

  3. Terry Yes it worked....I was grossed out to see a Yogart Parfait with Blue Berries on the menu this week! LMAO!!! I never liked the Clown Under the Bed .....the Midget lady was sweet! I liked her voice...Plus she plaid in 16 Candles....Piano Player Wedding Seen Right be fore Jake Ryan was waiting outside....I Loved Jake Ryan.......*SIGH

    Angie...Oh Girl I made potato cakes the other night he was all "Is that a Piece Of Fish?" Im like: "No its a Potato Pancake"....he was all:..."It looks Like Fish"...Im all: "What the Fuck fish have you ever seen that looked like Fried Mashed potatos?" He was Like: "What? I dont eat Fish"...I was all Yeah and You aint eating fish now either its a fucking Potato Pancake....Gah!" He then very fairy like takes a bite the size of a pea and is all swishing it around in his mouth.....Im Like: "DAVID REALLY????" He says: "Damn thats good why havent you made that before"...I already Know Mango and Hootchie Crusted Pork Chops I dont have the Patience for!
    Thanks for checking in!!!!
    Im gonna Pump Me UP!

  4. Antibiotics make the lady garden grow nasty itchy shrooms... me no likey.